Yesterday I booked my flight to Thailand!  September 1st I fly out.  It's on the corporate credit card, so no turning back now...

 

Last week,  Shaye and Teresa flew off to Kenya and Swaziland, respectively, for the month of June.  Maggie and Barton are heading off to Guatemala and India soon.  I head to Guatemala myself at the end of the month.  Rosie is leading a couple of STM trips in FL Somehow, we are all going to end back up together at the end of July to end this ComLife year.  Today, we set the table for family dinner as usual, and we realized we only took up half the table now, as opposed to having to squeeze in extra chairs.  The house is a little quieter and there are fewer voices piping in during our house meetings and bible studies.

 

It would be so darn easy to put on the cruise control and coast through til July 31st.   It's an all too familar feeling-staring down the home stretch of one season, standing on the precipice of a new one.  Once again, I am faced with a choice, what people at AIM love to call "ending well."

 

In my heart of hearts, my desire is to end all strong and victorious with a huge smile on my face.  My track record bears witness that this is always easier said than done.

 

Hmm.  I guess we will see what these next 6 or so weeks hold.  I'll keep you posted. 

 

 

*taken from Kim Daniels', fellow WR staff and proclaimer of justice, blog.  One of the ways God uses her to do this is through beautifully crafted videos that pierce you and leave you with a better understanding of the Father's heart. There is a cameo by Jim Larson, the founder of the Well and who I have been communicating with for the past few months.

When girls who have found themselves working in the Thailand bars, often as prostitutes, reach the point where they are looking for a way out, there is a place for them to go. 'The Well' is a home, a family, a workplace, a school, with a goal in mind: to restore that which has been in shambles, reconcile that which has been broken, and give hope where it has been deferred. 

 

Bangkok, Thailand has thousands of bars, with thousands of women who believe that selling themselves is their only option. Some have been forced into this life; some have been trafficked and work because of fear. The Well is a safe place where women can begin to build another life for themselves and their children, learning life skills by making high quality jewelry and crafts as an occupation. But she learns more than life skills here....

Visit Corridor of Hope

Check out this fun 'lil video some of my housemates put together last night.  If this doesn't make you want to run out and sign up for this program, I don't know what will ;)

 

Enjoy!

God started speaking to me about 5 years ago about his heart to see His people reach an understanding of what it means to be in covenent. First with Him, and then with others.  Most of the time the easiest thing to equate this to is marriage.  And while I believe marriage is designed to be a perfect representation of that, I can't shake the fact that we as the Body have somehow missed the understanding that we exist to walk this kind of lifestyle out together as well. Corporately.  Community is a hot buzz word today, especially in the younger generations.  We are crying out for something more, we have heard whispers and rumors that life together in Christ can look different .  That it is supposed to look different.

 

That's what led me to where I am today, trying to walk this out with 11 other people in this thing called Community Life.  And I won't deceive you by leaving out the fact much of the time has been hard, challenging, and sometimes, disappointing.  We have had successes and we have had failures.  There have been tears of joy and hope, along with just as many, if not more, tears of frustration and hurt.  A lot of the time, there have been more questions than answers.

 

Wow, you may be thinking.  Sounds like a blast.  Where do I sign up?  But, here's the thing.  Even in the midst of all this complicated stuff, there is one thing that God has assured me of: This is His heart. This is His plan for His church.  I am not talking about a program or an 11 month internship at a missions agency, but a paradigm shift.  We, those who call themselves followers of Christ, have limped along for awhile now under these divide and conquer tactics of the enemy.  Our default is  survival mode and this keeps us at a polite distance from one another.  No one is being set free, but no one is really at odds with one another either.  John Eldridge describes it as an army that keeps meeting for briefings, but never breaks into platoons and goes to war.  Here is the kicker though: We are at war.  There is a constant spiritual battle going on around us.  The kingdom of this world and the Kingdom of God are always at odds, and as co-heirs with Christ, we have an intergal part to play.  We cannot effectively do this, though, if we are constantly fighting one another, or worse yet, keeping ourselves cooly distant to avoid the messiness.  An infantry that is in the trenches together has to know one another intimately to defeat the enemy.  And as this intimacy is fostered and Kingdom is  advanced, freedom is released.  We are free to love and be loved-in a way that can radically change the world around us.  Gosh, no wonder Satan wants to keep this under wraps. 

 

If this stirs your heart, even a little, I encourage you to check out the information below and hit up the ComLife info page.  I can't promise you it will be perfect.   I can promise you that going after the things of God's heart will be worth it.    

Program Dates:
September 1, 2009 – July 30, 2010

To apply, please click here.  Once we receive your application, we'll send more details and contact you to discuss the program.  If you have questions, please call 1-800-881-2461 ext 214 or contact our Admissions Department.

 

 

Below is a video that was done by some of the gals on the January '08 World Race squad, who spent some time in Bangkok ministering alongside The Well, the ministry I will be joining in September.  It describes the Well's ministry better than I can at this moment :).  Much thanks to the lovely and talented Kim, for putting this together.  You can see more of her videos from Thailand here.

 

P.S.  I am starting to dive into my Thai CD's and book this week.  Pray for me.  This aint going to be easy ;)  kop khun ka (thank you!)

 

 

 

 

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Sarah Buller, an AIM participant in Port Elizabeth, South Africa, was killed in an automobile accident on Sunday. And though they're rejoicing in heaven, we're all the poorer for it. 

Her passing reminds us that God has called us to a road that is sometimes more than we can bear. Sarah set an example by following God's call in her life and ministering to the poor in South Africa. She loved Jesus and died serving him. We can't help but praise God for her life.

 

Her last blog entry a few weeks ago gives us a picture into her life:  "We work with kids in the townships and I work with babies. Life is good here. some days are more crazy then others!!! My parents just come to see me! And it was GREAT! They got to see the whole team. We went to Swaziland a country with in South Africa. I LOVED IT! My Dad got to see old friends. I'm in love."

 

"In love" describes Sarah's life well. She was in love with life and with those around her. And they couldn't help feeling it. Recently she got a tattoo on her foot. It said love, and it had a bunch of stars around it. Each star represented one person in her family, one for mom, one for dad, and one for each of her eight siblings (four of whom are adopted). She wanted them to be with her wherever she went!

 

Sarah was one of the sweetest people I have ever met. She was accepting of everyone. She loved to have fun, and she had no fear. We jumped off of a bridge together, bungee jumped that is. She is a night owl. She liked to stay up later than most, and sleep in later than most.

Sarah was precious when we were in ministry. We worked together at a children's home, with abandoned and beaten babies and toddlers. She was so good with all the kids. She wanted to be a mother so badly. She could handle toddlers better than most people.

 

She loved nature, and being outside. She loved the beach... and having ministry right next to the beach. She was blown away by the beauty of creation.

 

She was artsy... always seemed to have her camera on her... then she would photoshop them.

 

She loved music. She had a beautiful singing voice.

 

She loved youth. The youth group we worked with, Firehouse, was blessed by her. She really was able to invest in the girls... to help grow them up in Christ.

 

Sarah loved to worship God. Her life was worship.

I had fun with her. One night, we didn't want to go to bed, so we sat outside in the yard. We laid in the grass star gazing, while Kevin played guitar. It was a perfect night!

 

Then another night, we stuck our head out the window while laying on a bed and looked at the stars... or tried to look. the whole time we couldn't stop laughing... we were sooooo giddy!

 

Sarah just liked to have fun. She brought joy wherever she went. She was never negative. She loved what she was doing. She loved God and loved people.

She was amazing! And it's so hard to think that she is not around anymore, but I know, she is in the Lord's presence. She has no pain. She has complete and perfect joy! She is missed. But I can't wait to see her again!

Teammate Beth Lynch wrote this about Sarah, "I think one of my favorite stories of her was when she and a few other girls drove to a lion park for the day. Sarah went into a  cage with a lion cub and he pounced on her. She came back with a torn shirt and minor scrapes on her arm and stomach. She was so excited about it! We all laughed about how when she got home she could say that when she went to Africa, she was attacked by a lion."

One of our FYM missionary teams lost a participant to a car accident yesterday.  Many details are not released right now, but we do know that it involved a car accident during the group's Spring Break week away from ministry.  Please keep the family of this young girl in your prayers as they cope with this shocking loss.  I am also asking you to specifically lift up our leadership, especially Tag, Steve, and Seth as they counsel and debrief the team, and for wisdom on how to proceed from here.

 

The Lord is near to the broken-hearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3

I sat in the grass with my log,  watching the falling rain start to slightly smear the words I had written on it with a sharpie.   I had prayed people off to the task I was setting out to do before, but it was finally time to be on the participant side of things.  Here I was, in solidarity with my fellow ComLifers, crashing the surrender party of the 35 World Racers that were in training this past week.  The plan was to walk up a big stinkin' hill carrying a substantial log with stuff written on it that God was asking us to surrender to Him.  There are staff along the way at strategic points to pray, encourage, exhort and challenge.  By the time you reached the top, physically, emotionally and spiritually spent, you lay your log down at the foot of the cross, a symbolic act of releasing this burden to the Lord.  From the training side of things, it is a great catalyst, culminating days prior spent in inward reflection, grieving and healing.  But, now it was my turn.

 

I tried to focus on the things I had written on my log and pray through them as I waited to be sent off.  Honestly though, I was ticked that I had to sit out in the rain that just kept coming down harder.  I began to analyze the efficiency of the strategy that was being used to pray us all out (control was one of the thing's I had written...I wonder why??) and came to the conclusion that I was feeling completely unspiritual and unparticipatory at the moment.  This was going to be interesting.

 

I began to think back over the last couple of months.  I know I had been carrying burdens that were not mine to pick up.  I felt as if I went from one crisis management meeting to another.  People in my life ceased to be community , but problems I needed to manage.  I felt like there were a million questions and I had zero good answers.   I had put the ComLife leader hat on so much that it had somehow got permanently glued to my head, and I didn't know how to get it off.  I was overdrawn in my spiritual bank account and no one was making any deposits in.  As I continued to accumilate these burdens they became a weight upon me that was about to break me, spiritually and physically.

 

 As God was speaking to me about all this, He began to show me how life had gotten to where it was.  Is stuff hard right now? Sure.  Have a lot of crazy things happened and have I had to face some tough challenges and decesions?  You betcha. However, through the midst of it all, I had forgotten one very important fact:

 

Good one, Sherlock, you may be thinking.  But this is truth that I needed to let sink into the core of my spirit.  I would never consciously put in any kind of competition for deity status, but without realizing it, I had taken responsibility for people, for situations and for areas that only God can justly be soverign over.  And, by taking those things out of the Lord's hands and trying to place them in my own, I had not only limited His power in my life, but in the lives of those He has put under my care.  And, I was giving the Accuser a platform to do his thing and try to bring shame and condemnation upon me.  Of course he can whisper to me that I don't know what I am doing, that all of this is too hard for me to figure out, and I will never make it work.  It's easy for him to do that when all of those things are TRUE.

 

So, when I was finally prayed off by the wonderful world race coaches, I set off down the 1st part of the trail almost light-hearted.  I began to speak the names of people and situations I needed to release to the Lord out loud.  I repented for trying to take position in a place that was only rightfully His.   I was enjoying the walk and the revelation that the Lord was giving me.  As I got to the final incline, two staff prayed over me for strength to complete the journey.  The almost vertical climb on wet leaves left my mind occupied with not tumbling back down the slope.  As I neared the top and saw my fellow world race staffmates up there ready to greet us, I stopped to refocus myself.  As I did the final climb, I was surprised at the lack of emotions I had.  The whole thing just seemed very matter of fact to me.  When I kneeled at the cross at the top of the mountain, I put down my log and said a simple prayer of release.  Caroline came over to give me a hug.  "What did God say?", she asked.  I simply said, "That I am not Him".  "And I am grateful for that".   

 

While there was no outburst of tears or a gutteral cry of freedom that came with my own personal surrender walk (the guy next to me had a great time at the cross with that, though :), I know something broke in the spirit as I said yes to who He is.  And by taking my hands off the wheel, I allow Him to move in ways that I have been crying out for, yet preventing.

 

I am free.

 

And so is He.