Losing Life

Someone died today. 
It was rather unexpected and it just happened to be the first thing on
our journey that took me by surprise.  We’ve
each seen a lot and experienced a lot in the last few days but none of it
caught me off guard.  I was expecting
things out of the ordinary to occur but it’s not every day that, well, I’m
inches from God taking a life away.

We were in Tambo de Mora and a woman walked up to us and
asked us to come pray for her sister because she was sick.  We didn’t argue and told her that we would go
but as soon as we started heading that direction we heard screams and saw
everyone running. 

Her sister died.

I don’t know about you, but I’ve never been somewhere that
there’s a massive language barrier and  I
have no idea how to give solace during death. 
We had a team inside the house praying and there were several more of us
outside praying also.  The screams from
daughters, sisters, family members, friends – they’re still ringing in my head.  The helplessness I felt is still echoing in
the hallows of my being.  I ran out of
words to pray but my heart continued to ache for these people.  Not only had they just lost everything they
owned in an earthquake, including family members, but then another one is taken
away.  What’s worst is – there almost
appears to be no hope. 

If it wasn’t for Christ I think that it would all be
hopeless.

And this woman’s life wasn’t the only one that was lost
today.  I lost my own.  I’ve thought that I was such a badass because
nothing surprised me yet on this journey. 
I’ve had a black chicken stare me down during my devotionals, I’ve been
white-water rafting, I’ve sat cramped in a taxi too small for six people, I’ve
actually filled my stomach on very little food, I’ve taken one bucket shower,
and it wasn’t until today that God smacked me. 
Better yet, it wasn’t until today that I’ve finally felt numb, that I’ve
finally recognized God taking a part of me for Him.

“Our hearts must break before our hands can move.”  I was having such a hard time feeling.  Now I’m not. 
It’s really humbling to have your heart not only break for someone else,
but for your heart to break for yourself. 
I honestly don’t know how to handle it. 
It’s tough reality to face.  God’s
breaking me.  God’s ruining me and I
wouldn’t want it any other way.

I can’t wait to be wrecked even more.  I’m being stripped of myself to become more
like Him.  God’s transforming me into an
image of His son – one with skin on for others.

So God took two lives today. 
Mine and another.  And I wouldn’t
want to experience death any other way.

Amen.