I Am Responsible…The Bars Part 2

 

I downloaded Brooke Fraser’s album Albertine right before I left the states.  Good stuff-you should check it out.  The title track to the album has spoken deeply to my spirit since being here in Thailand, especially in regards to my time at the bars.  Fraser speaks of time she spent in Rwanda, especially with a girl named Albertine, a child left motherless in a war torn country and in need of someone to remember her.  Fraser promised the little girl that she would go home and tell her story.  She writes:

 

Now that I have seen

I am responsible

Faith without deeds is dead

Now that I have held you

In my own arms

I will not let go til you are.

 

As I strode down Soi Cowboy this last Monday, I walked as one with a purpose, where as a week before, I was uncertain as I took it all in.   We made our way over to the bar we hung out last week and were greeted excitedly by the girls. They rememberd us.  I asked for Naa, but was told that she had left just a minute earlier with a guy.  My stomache turned, hating the reality of what that meant.  We settle in, order a coke and begin chatting with the gals.  They are very distracted, sitting down for a minute, then hopping up to entice a customer over or grab a beer.  Nikki and I end up in this conversation with an English guy.  He looked like a youngin, but told us he was 22.  His godfather, of all people, dropped him off there to give him a taste of Thai night life.  Wow, we could all be so lucky to have kind of role model in our lives, hey?  He made sure to tell us quickly that he was not here for a woman, only losers paid for sex.    He gave us a quizzical look and asked, “So, what brings you ladies out here?’  We replied that we are here to just hang out and that we work for an organization that helps women, if they desire to, get out of this line of work.  His eyebrows went up at that.  He then proceeded to talk about this being a good situation for the girls.  At least they are protected and safe, unlike other jobs.  “Like construction”, he says.  “Do you know Thai women do construction here”?  “Nope, we replied, didn’t know that.”  “Oh yeah, it is so dangerous.  Women are much safer working in an environment like this than putting themsevles in danger in a job like that.”  Nikki and I just glance at each other incredeously.  Is that the best this guy could come up with?  I finally grew weary of hearing him go on in his ignorance and said, with a friendly smile, yet matter of factly, “No girl wants to be here.  I don’t care what anyone says, even what they say to make it through the day.  Deep down, I can’t believe any girl is here because this is what she wants to do in her life.”  “Yeah, I get it, he replied.  But, this isn’t that bad”  Gladly, we shifted topics to what he was studying in Uni.  I couldn’t take more convo along that line.  Eventually, he made his way inside to watch the gyratting topless girls.  Naa showed back up around that time.  Her smile could light up a room.  I ask her how her night is going.  Oh, great, she replies cheerily and proceeds to offer me some fried rice cake.  Maybe a parting gift from her customer?  I wonder how long it takes for it all to become normal to them? We hang out for a little while more and call it a night, with again the promise of returning the next Monday.

 

Please hear me, I do not think I have all this figured out after a couple of
nights out at the bars. I am not that naive-or arrogant (I hope).  But, I have seen.  I have
seen the sad looks on the girls faces that turn into fake smiles as men
come up to them.  I have heard pain even in the few conversations I
have had.  I have heard ridiculous things come out of customers’ mouths to justify satisfying their lusts and keeping this industry going.   Granted, I haven’t even begun to scratch the surface of relationships.  But it is enough for me to know that there is no turning back.  Ignorance is no longer an excuse. I feel the weight-a mantle of responsbility for these girls.  This place.  I may not have anything to offer, but I carry the authority of the One who has the power to transform not just one soi in Bangkok, but a whole nation.

 

A word I have gotten over and over again over the last year is being a mouthpiece.  That there is power in the things I proclaim.  Really, it’s nothing special or unique to me.  All God’s children have the power of life and death in their tounge (James 3).  I see this time as training ground on hearing the heart of God for a place and then speaking it out-things that are not, as though they were.  I believe this also includes being a mouthpiece to the church back in the states.  We can’t live in ignorance any longer.  There is too much a stake.    

 

I have ALOT to learn.  But, I can’t think of a better place to learn it.

 

I will tell the world

I will tell them where I’ve been

I will keep my word

I will tell them, Albertine..

 

below is the whole song, Albertine.  The video makes me miss Africa 😉